When I read I feel and see everything like a movie. When I write I am writing the movie I am seeing but it is harder because you have to word everything right. Like if the sky is grey and you never describe it the reader will see sunny skies. Writing is challenging but for me it is an amazing journey. I may not be the fastest nor the best but I am learning. I know their are people out there who sat down wrote a for a few days and had a best seller. I am just not one of those people I suppose. I take time with my characters. I let them build amazing worlds, friends, families, failures and triumphs in my mind. Then I have to process that to my computer.
My biggest challenge is wanting to be epic already and knowing I am a long way from that line. It isn't because my characters are not talking to me all the time nor because I have nothing to write about. It is because I have a beautiful life that takes every extra moment out of my hands. Most people have kids who can do everything themselves, never argue and can see the maybe's in life. I don't have that and I am married to a Marine who's day by day changes at a seconds notice. My three beautiful and amazingly awesome kiddios are special needs. One of you asked about how I mange this, how do I get anything done. Well I wake up at 4am and I prepare for the day. I start with coffee and then picking up anything that is lying around. From there I get them all dressed this is a hard task it takes about 25 minutes. As soon as they finish this I feed them breakfast. We don't often have eggs or pancakes its usually cereal or toast with some fruit and juice or water. I don't have time for elaborate. From there I open my daycare and we begin the rounds of getting to three different schools and managing our behavior. While I am working it is fun my youngest enjoys the projects and the learning. by the time nap comes it is time to pick everything up again and get paperwork in order. When it ends it is a couple hours of buses and school pick ups. A little time for homework and then its dinner, baths, story time, and bed. I have about an hour of energy at that point which I spend with my husband. So you see there isn't a lot of time for writing because if I take time to sit down and do it the world falls apart and the house becomes a crazed animal. I keep trying though and I keep a small note book of ideas and thoughts. I plan to start joining Friday night writers club and add an hour to my weekly college time for writing.
There is something beautiful in every moment with my family though. I get to hear their happiness and comfort their fears. As a parent we give up so much of our selves and though I get lost in that I always know that I wouldn't change a thing for the world.
I hope you all can find what is important and be okay with the little time for yourself so you can enjoy the big moments with your family because they are born and 18 in a blink of an eye.
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